Neville's Miserable Exsistance
by TheFirstElf
Summary: Neville/Hannah shipper. Oneshot R&R plz!


Autumn, Neville decided, was the worst time to be at Hogwarts. Gazing out of the window, sitting on the windowsill, he saw plants die as they lost their leaves, trees becoming mere skeletons of their old selves. Even the weather was awful: constant rain, and a mixture of summer and winter temperatures. Looking out of the window, Neville Longbottom reflected on his life: Since he was born, great things were exspected from him. He let everybody down. Infact, he spent most of his young life thinking he was squib, a wizard with no magic, and even when his magic was discovered, he could never be able to live up to his parent's legacy. His parent's, Frank and Alice Longbottom, were now in the specialized ward in St Mungo's. He sighed, thinking that he would never be good enough. Today, he thought, would be the fourteenth anniversary of his parent's torture, the fourteenth anniversary of the life that he had lost. Without realizing it, a single tear ran down his cheek.

"Neville... are you alright?" came a tremblig voice from behind him. As he turned around, he was faced by brilliant blue eyes, and blonde pigtails, as he looked at the face of Hannah Abbott.

"No...it's nothing really, it's actually very silly..." he muttered at Hannah. He had known her for almost years now. The first time they had met was at the Yule Ball, in their fourth year. They were both clumsy dancers so they decided to talk about how to improve their skills. They became fast friends, and their friendship improved during the D.A period. Everything was going well for everyone, except for Neville, the boy left behind.

"Neville, I've known you for a year now, and I've never seen you cry, even when you take Malfoy's abuse. So what is going on." she said, looking at the boy.

"Hannah, have you ever heard of Frank and Alice Longbottom?" he whispered, looking out of the window.

"Yes, weren't they the aurors who were tortured into insanity? Wait, _Longbottom_! Neville, were they related to you?" she asked, her eyes widening in apprehension

"They were my parents... and today marks fourteen years precisely since the day they were tortured. I really don't want to talk about it..." he said, gazing down at the lake.

Hannah's eyes went wider, her own eyes filling with tears. She never knew, then again, who would want to discuss it? Stepping forward, she turned Neville around, and hugged him fiercely, her tears staining his robes.

"I never knew, Neville, and I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring back any memories..." she whispered

"I was too little to remember it anyway... however, the thing that eats me the most, that really fills me with guilt, is that sometimes I wish they were dead, so I don't have to see their blank faces, so that I can mourn them properly. It is the most selfish thing I can think of, and I hate myself for it, but still, I can't help wishing it." he said, looking down at the witch huggung him.

"No Neville, don't hate yourself for it. It isn't selfish at all, infact, you are probably the bravest person I know. From what I understand, you have gone through life trying to live up to your parents, and failing, but you still try. You have spent your life caring for parents you never knew, parents that will never hug you, that will never care for you, but you still do it. You, Neville Longbottom, _are_ brave, and don't let anybody tell you otherwise." she said, looking back into his brown eyes. From here he looked almost handsome, with his brown hair covering his forehead.

"What's the use of being brave, when I can't get anything right. I'm not famous, like Harry Potter, not smart, like Hermione Granger, not funny, like Ron Weasley, not imaginative, like Luna Lovegood. I can't even stay on a broomstick! I'm a screw-up, a _nobody_. I can't even tell the girl I like how I feel! I'm hopeless, and you should stay away: I'm afraid this is contagious!" he muttered.

Hannah giggled slightly, her eyes full of compassion. "You're good at herbology, Neville, that's gotta count for something..." she said.

"Herbology? Bah! Everybody is good at Herbology, and Herbology is useless for..." he began

"Neville, shut up! This self loathing has gone on long enough! Whoever you are, you aren't the boy I've had a crush on since the third year!" she blurted, immediately covering her mouth after she had said it and turning a bright red.

Neville also went red and muttered "When I was talking about the girl I couldn't tell how I felt, I was talking about you Hannah...".

Both of them flushed, and for a few seconds neither spoke, then Neville lowered his head, just as Hannah raised hers. Their lips met, and for a few minutes, they just stood their, lip to lip, until a few cheers began to come from behind Hannah. Ronald Weasley accompanied by Hermione Granger stood there.

"You interrupted them! Honestly Ronald, you never change!" scolded Hermione, though obviously pleased for Neville. Neville himself was grinning from ear to ear, as was Hannah. For the first time in several years, Neville had found happiness. Unfortunately, it didn't last long. A few months later, Hannah Abbott's mother died mysteriously and she was taken out of school. Neville Longbottom's life returned to it's miserable normality, until at the end of the year, he recieved an letter:

_Hello Neville!_

_I'm currently on the run now. Both the ministry and You-Know-Who are chasing me to keep me quiet. I was wondering if I could stay at your house this summer, to hide out? Please let me know!_

_Hannah_

_P.S Careful, The owl has a terrible liking for oatmeal._

Sure enough, Neville's oatmeal had mysteriously vanished, but he didn't care. His miserable exsistence just got a whole lot better.


End file.
